For Immediate Release
BILLIONAIRES ATTEND COUNTDOWN CLOCK UNVEILING
Say Let Protesters Eat Snow
VANCOUVER -- February 12, 2007 -- Billionaires made a rare appearance in Vancouver for the unveiling of the 2010 Winter Olympics Countdown Clock. At that unveiling were unsightly protestors complaining about homelessness, ecological destruction, huge corporate profits, and massive public debt.
"What is it with these people?" said Lisa Likemoney, one of the Billionaires who attended the unveiling, "Don't they get it's our birthright to spend that money?" Lisa was wearing a beautiful black lamé gown for the event and matching hat.
"I think the bums should be thrown out into the street so they can get a job," said Max Profit, one of the other Billionaires out at the protest today, "We need more high end hotels and resorts so billionaires have a place to stay." 100's have been evicted in Vancouver as low-income hotels close for tourism putting people on the streets.
"Where's all the snow?" said Lisa. "There's not even any snow on the mountains. I flew in from my warm digs in Malibu just to be here and all I got was muddy feet," she said. Billionaires promote global warming as a hoax to scare politicians into producing lax legislation.
"There better be snow here come 2010 -- We've paid a lot of money for that!" Max said.
Despite the protestors and threat of no snow due to Global Warming, Billionaires continued to be optimistic. "I think it's great that we're helping you spend all that money," said Profit. "That money was in danger of going toward social housing and feeding lazy bums! If they don't like it, let them eat snow!" Profit said.
The Billionaires were pleased that the politicians they paid for were in top form.
"The Olympics are GREAT for business! Our kind of business! We're Billionaire$$$! We love spending your money!" the Billionaires were heard to have said.
Vancouver's Billionaires for the Olympics was inspired by the popular Billionaires for Bush campaign in the U.S.
For more information:
Max Profit, firstname.lastname@example.org
Lisa Likemoney, email@example.com